1 Year Reflection
October 3, 2024
Long time no see, everyone. I know I have not posted many updates lately, but my brother and I are both busy, living life, and doing okay.
Today marks one year since Mom passed away. I knew it would be a heavy day, so I took time off work to reflect and honor her privately. I have spent the day looking through photos and old memories, thinking about how much life has changed in a year.
If I could update the version of myself from last October, I would tell her this: You are going to be okay.
This year stretched me in ways I never expected. I started a new job as a Deaf Education teacher, began my Alternative Licensure Program, moved into a new place, and faced personal health challenges. There were months when I felt overwhelmed and unsure of myself. Balancing work, school, and grief was harder than I imagined.
But slowly, things began to shift. I found my rhythm at school. I grew more confident in my classroom. I leaned on mentors and friends. I made changes that helped me feel healthier and more grounded. Little by little, I started to feel like myself again.
Now we are back in October. My heart is still heavy at times. Grief shows up unexpectedly and reminds me how deep love runs. But I am not as afraid of the future as I once was. I am learning that I can carry her with me while still moving forward.
There is a song from Toy Story called “When She Loved Me” that has meant a lot to me this year. These lyrics especially stay with me:
“When somebody loved me
Everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together
Lives within my heart
…
Through the summer and the fall
We had each other, that was all
Just she and I together
Like it was meant to be
…
And she smiled at me and held me
Just like she used to do
Like she loved me
When she loved me.”
That is how I choose to remember her. Not in the pain of losing her, but in the beauty of being loved by her.
Mom, I miss you every single day. I hope you are proud of the woman I am becoming. I am still marching forward, just like you taught me.
Love,
Katie
